Why Do Orthodox Jewish Women Wear Wigs (If They Look Better Than Hair)?
Judaism is generally very positive about sex, regarding it as a divine gift and a holy obligation - both for the purposes of procreation and for pleasure and intimacy. The Talmud specifies not merely that a husband is required to be intimate with his wife, but sources also indicate that he is obliged to sexually satisfy her. Instead, sexual activity is highly circumscribed in Jewish tradition, as the rabbis of the Talmud sought to use the human libido as a tool for increasing the population and strengthening marriage. Traditional Jewish law not only prohibits many types of sexual relationships, but it also dictates specific parameters even for permitted ones. And while Judaism is broadly permissive when it comes to sex between married adults, the same is not true for sexual activity outside of a committed relationship.
Then came the really shocking admissions. My husband isn't interested. As I listened to one woman after another bemoan her sad sex life, I thought about how, after five years of marriage, Avy and I are hotter than ever. When I was a horny college senior in love with a Catholic boy from the East Coast, I never would have believed that one day I'd be an Orthodox Jewish wife with two beds in my room.
I've always been Jewish, but I didn't become Orthodox until I was in my twenties.
Perks Of Dating A Jewish Girl
I chose this way of living because I liked the way Orthodox husbands looked at their wives - with smoldering sensuality, hidden knowing, and reverence. They spoke sweetly and didn't play games, and I never saw the flicker of distance in their eyes. After years of dating guys who didn't pay for my dinner, much less pay attention to me, I was ready for a real connection.
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Hooking up wasn't getting me what I wanted: love. It was time to try something else, and this looked like a world I could get into. There are many elements of Judaism that keep me religious, but the most compelling one is observant marriage.
The night before my wedding, my mother and sister came with me for my first dunk. By the Orthodox Union's estimate, there are roughly mikvahs in America, but they aren't listed in the phone book, and they don't have big signs proclaiming their purpose.
Hidden from the road by tall fencing and overgrown shrubs, the mikvah's bricks held secrets. Bayla, a rabbi's wife, was waiting for us. Brides can dunk first, before sunset, while other women don't start preparing until they see three stars in the night sky.
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Bayla led my mother and sister on a tour. You'll see how it would feel. I carried my backpack into the changing room and latched the door behind me. I washed my hair and combed out tangles, flossed my teeth, filed my nails.
I stared in the mirror, wondering if this ancient ritual would keep my marriage alive through decades of humdrum, everyday life. It's not just the mikvah that makes Orthodox Jew sex so great: The entire system creates over-the-top intensity. To start with, you're shomer n'giyahso you don't touch anyone of the opposite sex - no handshaking, air-kissing, or friendly hugs. In my world, every touch is electric.
Then there are the laws of yichu whereby a man and woman who are not related are never alone in a private place.
13 Things You Should Know Before Dating a Jewish Girl
When my neighbor's husband came to help with the sprinklers when Avy wasn't there, he walked around to the backyard instead of taking the shortcut through the house. We do this because it's part of God's laws, but also because, as my rabbi explained before our wedding, "It's about noticing the details.
There's more. In the Aramaic wedding contract that spells out my husband's obligations, my sexual satisfaction is among them. Hebrew horny mature mom loves bbc.
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Though some rabbis in the Talmud were highly restrictive about which sexual activities married couples could engage in, the prevailing view was that a man may do with his wife as he wishes provided he has her consent.
This ruling is explicitly codified by Maimonides and by the 16th-century authority Moses Isserles known as the Remawhose commentary on the Shulchan Aruch is considered authoritative by Ashkenazi Jews. While some rabbinic authorities consider fellatio to run afoul of the prohibition on spilling seed, this is not universally accepted even within Orthodox circles.
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From this specific allowance for non-procreative ejaculation, some extrapolate that any sexual act undertaken in the context of a permitted sexual relationship is acceptable even if it results in sperm not being used for reproductive purposes.
As with female masturbation, oral sex performed on a woman does not raise issues of spilled semen.
Attitudes have shifted dramatically in recent decades, with sharp differences between the Orthodox and liberal movements. Efforts to make the community more compassionate have stopped short of sanctioning gay relationships.
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What about premarital sex? What is the Jewish view on masturbation? Is pornography acceptable? Is sexting permitted? Does Judaism allow oral sex? Join Our Newsletter Empower your Jewish discovery, daily. Sign Up. Discover More.